STD, Drug Addict, Nazi or Terrorist?

Then you can’t come in..

What are you going on about Clare...?

I was helping my friend do her online visa application for the US the other day and quite frankly was amazed at the questions..you used to fill a green card in to get here.. now the US government like to see who is coming before they are on the plane...

Its called an ESTA (Electronic System for Travel and at the request of the Spanish government, the name of the requirement was changed from ETA (Electronic Travel Authorization) to ESTA because of concerns about the Basque separatist group which also goes by the initials "ETA". 

Let’s take a quiz and see how many you’d answer yes to..

1. Do you have a communicable disease; physical or mental disorder; or are you a drug abuser or addict?

A bit much to lump STDs in with mental health disorders.. or the other way around…

Definition of communicable disease

• Chancroid

• Gonorrhea

• Granuloma inguinale (do you even know what this is.. … click the link.. it’s a bit scary!)

• Leprosy, infectious

• Lymphogranuloma venereum (nope didn’t know this one either)

• Syphilis, infectious stage

• Tuberculosis, active

• And others as determined by the Department of Health and Human Services
(so that could be anything then!)
Do I need a trip down the local clinic for a clean bill of health before I answer this ?

Drug Abusers and Drug Addicts

Under United States law persons may not be admissible if they have been determined to be a drug abuser or drug addict.

What do you mean I look different to my passport photo?

Does smoking a bit of pot at college count..? ‘cause none of you are coming in if that’s the case…

2. Have you ever been arrested or convicted for an offense or crime involving moral turpitude or a violation related to a controlled substance; or have been arrested or convicted for two or more offenses for which the aggregate sentence to confinement was five years or more; or have been a controlled substance trafficker; or are you seeking entry to engage in criminal or immoral activities?

So I’m a drug trafficker and I’m going to answer yes to this?

Please check my suitcase officer, I have 50lbs of Cocaine

Apparently the concept of moral turpitude escapes precise definition but has been described as an "act of baseness, vileness or depravity in the private and social duties which a man owes to his fellowmen, or to society in general, contrary to the accepted and customary rule of right and duty between man and man." The specific acts that such a concept includes inevitably change over time, as general public acceptance or abhorrence of issues alters; for example, until recent times, a man engaged in homosexual behavior was still considered as engaging in "criminal behavior involving moral turpitude." Basically ‘no gays allowed then’… hmmmm interesting…. This was in effect until 1990!!! WOW behind the times or what!

C) Have you ever been or are you now involved in espionage or sabotage; or in terrorist activities; or genocide; or between 1933 and 1945 were you involved, in any way, in persecutions associated with Nazi Germany or its allies?

My favorite… yes sir.. I’m a spy and I’m coming to steal your secrets… Errrrr…or I thought I'd try and re-enact 9/11 whilst I was on vacation in Orlando... errrrr

And if I worked with the Nazi’s in 1933 I’d be the approaching 100.. and so am a complete threat to National security!

That's me in the middle

There’s a few more that actually make more sense… you know, have been denied a visa before? ( you know when you answered yes to above last time D'OH) Are you seeking work?… but none of which you are ever going to answer yes to if you ever wanted a VISA to come in… cause if you have been previously denied you better have a new passport number these days as your passport would be flagged automatically… I watched someone deported at Orlando once for trying to come in on a passport that was previously denied.. she had been barred 8 years ago and they still got her.. She was on next plane back to UK ..arggghhh.. Its another story as to why I was sat in immigration being Nellie Big Ears .....